I knew this would happen again. I knew that he would do something to merit a new entry. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. I love my husband more than life itself, and I know that I should count my lucky stars every day that I managed to find him.
But then his complete and utter absence of a sense of direction kicks in.
Backstory: We commute to work together. We work about 90 km away from where we live. It’s easily an hour and half every morning. In the evenings, we take a toll highway, because it shaves some time off of our commute home.
We have both been in our current jobs for almost a year and a half. That’s 320 days (give or take a sick day/vacation here or there) that he has driven home. For the record, he drives home every day because that is his preference. He thinks I drive too aggressively. I tell him that I drive very assertively, and there is a difference, although it is subtle. As a matter of fact, I am probably the most defensive driver, because, since I am familiar with what it means to drive like an asshole, I know what the other assholes are going to do, and I can anticipate what crazy shit they are going to pull. But, again, I digress. Over 300 days of taking the same route home. Day after day.
after day…
after day.
So, what does he do today? He jumps on the toll road, and I settle in with my loverly new(ish)MacBook Pro (that’s a post for another day). Half and hour later, I look up, and notice that nothing looks familiar. Were they doing roadwork? No. Had they planted new trees? No. Had my husband gotten on the highway going in the opposite direction and driven for THIRTY SOLID MINUTES in what I will charitably call a post-work-day daze in the wrong direction? Yes.
Have I mentioned this is a toll-highway? That we pay for EVERY KILOMETRE we drive on it?
Not to mention the fact that we have to leave the house at 6:30 am every morning, and don’t get home until after 6pm every night… on a good day. Suffice it to say, a 12-hour day is plenty long enough for me. I don’t need to add a half an hour to it, going in the wrong direction.
I used to think that perhaps he was just on some kind of autopilot, I mean, it happens sometimes right? But, no, because if this was autopilot, we would have been in the right direction.
My mind is boggled.
But, that being said, I realize how lucky I am when, in the mornings, when I am rushing around figuring out what I am going to wear, doing my hair, putting on make-up, he is already downstairs in the kitchen filling/emptying the dishwasher, cleaning up the kitchen.
He really is the best. But he couldn’t find his way out of a paperbag with a flashlight shining into the “out” end.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
The Husband Chronicles (2)
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husband chronicles
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7 comments:
That is H-I-L-I-A-R-I-O-U-S. That is also something I have done in the past (but on a road I didn't know, although I did also run out of gas because of my "detour")
He is lucky to have you ;)
Funny story. Commutes are definitely bad enough without adding on an extra hour. Hopefully he was just having an 'off' day. Cheers from NCLM.
And the point is? (a fellow directionally challenged who is totally sympathizing with your hubby and wondering why you have a problem with taking the scenic view home)
whaaaahahahaaha! That's too funny. I try to always bring a book when my husband drives us anywhere because he likes to try to see how many lives I've got. He's the scariest driver out there. I'm more an offensive driver, I like to be far away from any traffic and/or people and I curse loudly with rude hand gestures. But I've never been in an accident and he has been in about 5, so who is the better driver?!
You're a saint for driving so long to work and back every day. I'd have to shoot myself or try to find a job I could do at home.
(here from NCLM, again)
Okay, that paper bag statement cracked me up! You are a very lucky woman, indeed. I have an ex who was every bit as absentminded, but who wasn't the generous and reliable soul that your hubby is. It must be so nice to have him in your life.
Visiting from NCLM
AH! I thought it was just my husband!
Anytime we go anywhere, even places we've been a million times, I have to keep my eyes on the road to make sure he is going the right way!
What the devil? It's SO ANNOYING!
Very funny post!
This post could have been written by my husband about me....hangs head in shame
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